How to Intentionally Gift
The key to giving gifts that will last, and some of our top items!
In a season of gifting, the act of giving can become one of obligation; an empty gesture meant to fulfill a social role, or standard. Who are we proving something to? The more money we spend, the more love and virtue we demonstrate. Does the receiver even want a new blender, another shirt, or a new set of mugs? We didn’t ask. The reality is, it’s all too easy to give ourselves over to a set of pre-written narratives, play them out like we’re empty cadavers, puppeted by some corporate zeitgeist, composed of a compendium of advertising slogans.
In this issue, we want to share some ideas for gifts that could bring insight and beauty into the lives of those you love. That being said, take it with a grain of salt. Not everyone wants gifts. Some people genuinely appreciate things like quality time, a home cooked meal or a handwritten letter MORE than any object you could give them. The art of gifting is an art of listening. We’ll dive in more on how to master this art below.
Hayao Miyazaki’s Noface character in spirited away is such a poignant analogy for the hungry ghost; a being with endless desire that can never be sated. In the film, when he is given kindness, compassion and removed from the environment of the bathhouse (space of consumer capitalism), he is able to relax and enjoy a quiet life.
The Lissome Intentional Holiday Gift Guide
With a little something for everyone, we’ve got books, scents, wearables and courses that can connect with your loved ones on that soul level.
Cozy up with The Day the World Stops Shopping by J.B. Mackinnon
I’ve linked the audiobook here, but of course it is also available in paperback. This surprisingly refreshing read takes an optimistic and realist approach to tackling climate through the lens of consumerism. Mackinnon is excellent at addressing the complex, multi-faceted phenomenon that is consumerism. Why do we do it? What would fixing it actually look like? What would the implications be? These questions touch on an emotional and deeply psycho-social dynamic, as well as the big picture view of structures, industry, jobs and resources.
Keep your Noggin Covered with Governess and Baby Hats
Olga creates the most gorgeous and versatile hats with natural fibres, and weather resistant treatments like waxed cotton. Her newest release includes an adorable hen bag along with weather proof caps and scarves all in one. If you want to get a deal, message her on Instagram, so she can get all the profits without the Etsy seller fee!
Advaya is a resource for learning new non-traditional topics for the mystics and the witches out there.
In this particular course, it teaches practical tools to inhabit our bodies and the natural world that feed our awe and curiosity. It teaches somatic skills ranging from the foundational to the advanced and subtle that enable one to better meet the challenges of our times by finding comfort and inspiration in their own body, and in the natural world.
Infuse Summer into the Cold with Libertine Fragrances
Libertine Fragrances are dreamed and made by Joshua Smith in Western Canada. Recently, I was reading about the toxic ingredients in most perfumes, and was excited to see just how clean and natural every ingredient in Joshua’s delicious scents are.
“Exploring scent helps you to become more sensitive to the world around you. It helps you discover all the beautiful parts of you that have been hidden away.” - Joshua Smith
Brownstone Playhouse makes eclectic handmade toys and dolls inspired by the creator’s childhood in Brooklyn. The gorgeous textiles combined with the wooden details and hand stitching make these feel like just a special keepsake to be passed on for generations.
How to Give Intentionally
So, now that you have some very alluring options of gifts to purchase, it’s time to get clear on how to give well. Often, we project our own desires in the process of giving, prioritizing what we think our recipient should have over what they might really want. The implications are not menial. They are twofold: first, contributing to a growing mass of post-consumer waste, and second, being part of a culture of carelessness around our material world. Imagine if your loved one, in a perpetual underlying state of guilt, refused to give away the snow globe you gifted them, and instead lived with an object they felt ambivalent about for years and years. Now, this may seem like an over-dramatization; an overly precious reading of something quite small and insignificant. But, as Marie Kondo reminds the world, our relationship to our surroundings is fundamentally constitutive of internal states. We can cultivate joy through a meaningful and intentional relationship to the things around us, and the inverse is just as true. And hey, why not take it one step further: in an animist view of the world, our objects hold feelings too. Don’t subject the snow globe to a life of shame and dust, and a place on the bottom back of an overcrowded shelf.
Here’s a general process to follow:
Ask
Get curious. Talk to people. Not just around the holidays, but year round. Make a practice of really getting to know the people around you on a deeper level. What do they most desire? What little something is missing from their life? What does their inner child crave?
Listen
When they speak, don’t check your phone, don’t pretend you’re listening and think about your deadline this week. Really listen to them, ask follow-up questions, and then listen some more.
Make your Own Decision
Your daughter might say she wants, from her heart of hearts, the newest jacket from Zara. Do you oblige? I cannot tell you what to do, and nor can we change other people through sheer will. I don’t have a neat answer for this. Focus on getting people things with longevity. Just how dogmatic you want to get with your gift giving is up to you.
The goal, long term, is that the more and more we attune to our real needs, truly listen to each other, and fill our lives and spaces with things that bring us joy, the less we really think about or desire anything else. The change doesn’t happen overnight, and along the way we need to bring a lot of grace, compassion and love to the parts of ourselves and others who may still be feeding our hungry ghosts. Shame will only make them louder.
Community News
Welcome back to: Community News.
Here, we invite you to share new initiatives in the fashion and textiles space, open calls, residencies, funding opportunities, job listings, and other news that will benefit and engage this growing community. If you have something to share, we’d love to hear from you. Let’s stay connected and inspire one another!
To share your news, email us at mail@thelissome.com or fill in this form.
A Growing Culture is Hiring a Creative Director
Job Opportunity
A Growing Culture (AGC) is seeking a visionary Creative Director to lead their creative evolution and drive impactful storytelling at the intersection of food sovereignty, cultural rebellion, and collective liberation. This role oversees AGC’s creative output, ensuring all visual and narrative elements resonate with the dynamic cultural, social, and aesthetic landscapes.
Apply here / Deadline: 6 January, 2025
For questions, email us at info@communitycloth.eu
More information In the Google Doc
FCG Future Minds by Istituto Marangoni 2025
Scholarship Award
Istituto Marangoni and Fashion Council Germany are pleased to present the FCG FUTURE MINDS SCHOLARSHIP by ISTITUTO MARANGONI. In this second edition, two young talents will be awarded with a scholarship for a Master’s degree at Istituto Marangoni London and Istituto Marangoni Milano.
Join this webinar on December 16, and find out all you need to know to apply!
More information here.
Join The Lissome Team ✨
Job Listing
The Lissome is looking for an experienced freelance salesperson to help us develop sponsorship partnerships on a commission basis. This remote role is perfect for someone with a love for social impact, a network in the (slow) fashion and lifestyle industry, and experience in building meaningful partnerships.
💌 If you are interested, or know someone who might be a great fit, we’d love to hear from you! Email us at mail@thelissome.com with your CV and a cover letter detailing your experience.
To share your news, email us at mail@thelissome.com or fill in this form.
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